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Rants & Raves
Norman Bates: "She just goes a little mad sometimes. We all go a little mad sometimes. Haven't you?" Psycho
I think that sums it up nicely.
Where to begin; an explanation of my thoughts might help clarify. There are many different aspects to this family, each having its own story. Every member has a different recollection of the same event. How it should be? What really happened? More often than not this has caused quite a bit of discourse, and for some a new perspective on what actually happened. This depth and difficulty offers more complete information than any one person could possibly provide.
Life has dealt each of us such a different hand none of which has been easy. Some have been more fortunate than others, yet somehow we face the challenges head on and seem to prosper; following our own paths, toward an uncertain future.
Through lots of hard work and searching, some outside force has made it possible for most of us to be reunited. The reunification has helped many, hurt a few, and confused us all. With this reunification comes difficulties; facing the past as it thrusts into our face like a bully in the school yard.
The way each one deals with this, makes it possible for our lives to move forward or in some cases, just continue. Some have been able to confront the "bully" victoriously, able to move past this seemingly endless battle, while others seem to cower and avoid the confrontation, hiding unable to actually live the life they have. This reluctant act has driven many of us to a point where we cannot assist or are unable to aide in the defeat of the "bully"; a constant battle, leaving us with a feeling of being tormented and worn, unable to cope.
Those that are unable to move on seem to linger in this place where no one understands what you are going through, or where you have been. Like being alone in a place where everyone speaks another language. There is no way to communicate or get your point across, you talk and talk, still no one comprehends the way you feel; desolate and weak.
This battle has taken us down many roads, hate, anger, depression, frustration, and self condemnation. Roads that take you nowhere leading to a life of self loathing, poverty, and possible self destruction. Though these roads seem the only path that we are able to follow, look for a way to cross and move to a path that will lead somewhere away from the eminent fate that would eventually obliterate what sense of humanity that remains.
Walls have been built, they must come down to allow those that care and love you to penetrate your wounded soul. This unusual feeling of happiness and hope may frighten and confuse you just embrace it. This odd feeling helps with growing, learning, coping, loving, living, and learning. The best advice I can offer is to forgive those who have wronged you, and love those that need love; it will only make a better person out of you.